Follow me on Twitter
All requests for following must be approved by PrettyWreck
before tweets can be seen ♥

Ask me Anything
A formspring account where I'll try to
reply to all questions posed ♥

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Good Day and Discovered OCD

So last month was a good month for loss. Despite the chaos of my mom and her family coming in to town, and the four days spent gorging on buffets, pizza, and late night foods while they were here, I still managed to lose a total of 6.2 pounds. MORE, if you count where my high was in the month (after my mom left, I was at 134.6). My month ended with me at 128.2. So I'm hoping that my goal of being 123 or under by October 31st is actually truly achievable.

This also means I have about 1lb left to lose before I take another set of pictures. I've been trying to record at regular 10lb intervals. I have my weight at 197, then 187 (I think?), 177, 167, etc., etc., etc.. So that way, when I reach 103, I can post up the progress pics. I was right about 10lbs counting more and more after I had gotten past the 140 mark. At 137 I still had pretty heavy rolls in the back, but now they're almost gone. Which is such an awesome feeling. Now if only my calves would go away, too.

I've been working on homework all night, and watching "Supersize VS Superskinny" episodes on youtube. I forget who linked to the first episode in the first season from their blog, but to whoever did, I dunno if I should thank you, or smack the shit out of you. It's such a killer show, and while at first I was sorta iffy on it, now I'm addicted.
I've also been refraining from looking for more thinspo songs. I've found a program for firefox where you can rip the mp3 off of a youtube video, which is awesome for all those songs I can't seem to locate. Even to buy them D:

But while working, I've discovered my OCD quality. I have quite a few of them, but when I was doing my research for my psych class's term paper last spring, they said that individuals suffering from ED's (even to lesser extremes) are also OCD. Depending on their level of ED also depends on their level of ritualistic OCD behaviors.
Mine is white out.

I cannot - CANNOT - write in pencil. I draw in pencil. I do math homework in pencil. Beyond that, I won't use it. But I also can't stand there to be a million different scribble marks on my page. So I use white out. I have to pause in my notes every minute or two to white out something, and then wait for it to dry. It has to be a sponge brush, and I have to put it over the mark until covered. I count the strokes. And when it's covered fully, I do 1-2-3 extra strokes to make sure it's smooth, and then pause to lightly dab at any areas that may still have bits of ink sticking out.
It's not terribly OCD, but I've noticed before that my papers have always looked half painted with the shit, and whenever I'm on restricting phases, it gets much worse.

Anyway, just something interesting I had to share.

Also, on this show, Supersize VS's amazing to realize just where I was in comparison to a lot of these people. One girl was on there who was 5'2, and 237 pounds.
That was maybe 30lbs heavier than my highest. And I'm over 100lbs away from that now.
I never realized how fat I was. How dangerously close I was to just...not being able to exist anymore. No wonder I was always so sick and had so many health problems.
My BMI at my worst was 41.8.
I mean JESUS.
I'm now at 25.9. Still overweight, but getting there.

So that's all for the day.
I promise I'll catch up on blogs soon. I just need to try to finish this chapter. And then it's GYM after work.


  1. congrats. youre so amazing. cant wait for new picturesss

  2. I can't wait either, I too have alot of OCD qualities, some of them are so odd, like looking behind doors or every large space I can't see before leaving a room! Youve come so far! I'm so impressed! keep it up x

  3. 41 to 25? (swearie alert) FUCK.

    I mean seriously: FUCK

    You really deserved those sparingly rationed FUCKs, but now I'm on panic rations for the next month.

    Oh golly. 41 to 25.

    It is stuck in my brain.

    Help me! stuck. in. my. brain.


    I seriously super-duper-ly cannot wait to see those pictures of the most incredible person in the WORLD.

    ;);) LOVEYA

  4. Hey. I've read your entire blog now, and even though it took a helluva lot of time, it was worth it. I really like the way you write and it's always especially inspirational to follow someone who has a mountain to climb rather than an anthill.

    And you have like totally awesome taste in women.

    Good luck and all that. I'll be following from now on, and I truly do hope the best for you.

  5. I love Supersize vs. Superskinny, I can't remember whose blog I saw it on first but I'm addicted now two, I think I got through the whole first season in like a week or two!

  6. you're doing such a fantastic job! keep up your amazing work! i can't believe you lost so much weight even with the fam around!!

  7. hey girl! love the blog and congrats on the weight loss! that shows so much control!!! :)

    stay strong beautiful!

  8. Wow... That is truly amazing! 100lbs away from your highest! That is sooo cool honey!! I can't wait for the new pic's!!

    Love Cille

  9. Holy shizzzzz.
    You've lost so much and you should be beyond proud.
    I don't lie about this kinda shiz.

    You deserve a pat on the back!
    *Pats back* :)

  10. That's amazing how much weight you've lost, really.

    I found your blog and was reading through a lot of your past posts.
    Well done on all the weight loss; seriously :)