1 year ago, I weighed 190 pounds.
Today, I weigh 128.4lb's.
Not the weight I wanted.
I'm behind on my current goal.
I'm also behind on my original goal of being 103 by this time.
But I'm closer than I was before.
I feel very tired.
Last night was a full sleeping pill night, and of course, that led to a binge.
But no more.
I went out with a friend rather than exercise.
Which is a no no.
When my life is in order,
then I can have friends.
When I complete my goals,
like finding an internship,
getting my trainer insurance,
and stop sabotaging myself,
and start losing weight again,
then I can be allowed to go out and have friends again.
Then I'll be allowed to be a regular person again.
Until then, I'm grounded.
Only work, school, and diet for PrettyWreck.
Because she betrayed Ana last night and went out with a friend, rather than listened to her and exercised.
And for that, I binged, and didn't work out, and am behind on my goal.
I failed her.
And she deserves better.
I deserve better.
I will be successful.
No matter what.
I will be productive.
1 year ago, I started on this.
I don't know why, but the switch flipped, and suddenly, I was worshipping the hunger goddess.
I had always had a disordered relationship with food,
but one year ago today,
I grabbed it by the reigns and took control. Stopped eating, and started losing.
It's like another birthday. Which is always awesome
Anyway, time for a shower.
*mwah*
Wish me luck, dollies.
I'm off to the gym tonight.
♥ PrettyWreck ♥
you're incredible, hope you know that
ReplyDeleteI hope you get back to regular posting, I've been missing you in these parts lately
Happy Anniversary!!
I just want you to know that your 60+ lb. weight loss is so inspirational. I know you'll make it 103; you're strong. You're like the freaking high priestess of the hunger goddess. :)
ReplyDeletexoxo
CONGRATULATIONS!!!!
ReplyDeleteHave fun at the gym, wish I could go with but I'm supposed to go jogging tomorrow morning. So stoked!
Stay Strong
muah
You've still made amazing strides. I'm very proud of your success and commitment. It's really incredible!
ReplyDeleteWow that is amazing! I know you aren't at the weight you want to be at yet, but some people would never have been able to do what you did, so you should be so proud of yourself! Stay strong, and good luck at the gym!
ReplyDeletexo
wow. you are truly amazing. one binge, but for an entire year you've been treating yourself right. you can make it right and seems like u'r already on it - hitting the gym! :) /xo
ReplyDeleteHappy anniversary. You've made it farther than anyone else I know. Be proud. <3
ReplyDeleteThat's so inspiring, seriously, you are incredible.
ReplyDeleteNearly SEVENTY pounds!
And you are so close! Hope you're okay xx
Even though you aren't were you wanted to be you still lost over 60 pounds! That's like a small child that you melted right of your body. Just keep chugging and I know you will get there. We will all get there!!
ReplyDeleteYou are so awesome- you've achieved control even if you can't see it at times. You know why? Because you've been consistant and that is the ultimate victory.
ReplyDelete