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Tuesday, April 21, 2009


Two drums and symbol fall off of a cliff.
"Ba-dum, CHSHH!"
(That's the sound of them falling, as well as the classic sound of a punchline drum thing. It's much better when said out loud. Especially when two drunk guys are trying to tell you it and keep botching it. Anyway.)

I have lost 9 pounds in 20 days.

I guess that's supposed to be fast. It doesn't feel fast. Not when every ounce is a struggle. I feel emotionally and physically exhausted. I'm looking through my pen and ink book describing everything, and it's amazing how abusive I can be toward myself. I'm normally a happy person, but since this...THING has taken over my head, I can't be happy. I don't like it.

I know I should change it, but I keep saying, "Justa little more. It's worth it for now."

I have two weeks to lose 5 pounds. I want to be close to my last "low weight" for pride festival. Because it'll mean that I'll have lost 30 pounds between last pride and this one. And it's not a lot of weight to have lost, considering how much I need to. I don't even want to say it here, because it's so far removed from what other people have.

I need to pull up Pandora and listen to music.

1 comment:

  1. Loosing 30 pounds is amazing and you should be proud of yourself when you reach that. Think of it this way: there are plenty of people who can't even force themselves to loose 1 pound.

    Try treating yourself when you reach goals, and don't give up.