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Sunday, May 23, 2010

New Lows...not in the good way.


Yesterday, I binged.
Binged.
And Binged some more.




Oh, then I binged MORE. Like....way more.
Lots and lots more.
Like, as in, I went from 123.8 to 126.6 today.
Holy crumpets, yo.



Partway through it, between points when mys tomach was so distended it was hard, and when it was just full enough to be uncomfortable but to let me eat more....between digging the cookies out of the trashcan to shove in my mouth with ice cream, and searching for bleach to coat the rest of the thrown out food in so I would at least vomit it up if I ate it out of the trash again....I started looking up information on how possible it is to cauterize taste buds.



Apparently, not very possible. In fact, the tongue regenerates too quickly for permanent damage to truly occur. The way to kill tastebuds is through nuerological damage, as what you SEE on your tongue, isn't the tastebuds. A "tastebud" actually is part of a coating of something like slime that comes out of your tongue, produced by the intrinsic nerves, that conducts taste. So really, tastebuds are not physical.
The point is, I was actually to the point where I was going to try and cauterize my tongue to destroy my ability to taste.
Looks like I'm going to have to rely on orajel, won't I?

Think I'm going to try relying on an orajel and baby food diet. Gotta try to hide the baby food and make out like I'm really eating, but just keep my tongue coated in orajel, and yeah....
Gonna go buy the baby food tonight.
That's the diet for next week.
Let's see how much I lose.

Anyway, signing off for now. Gotta clean and then gotta go running. Need to get these fucking calories off of me.

9 comments:

  1. Not the most helpful comment, but... I'm sorry you had a rough day. :(

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  2. I did terrible also hun! tomorrow is a new day!!! let's make the best of it.

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  3. we all do things we regret. all you can do now is to start fresh. i wish you the best and if it doesn't kill you it makes you stronger.

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  4. I know how you must feel. Hope you have a good run, and good luck with the diet this week. I know you'll be able to do it! Stay strong x

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  5. Good luck with the new diet! I'm sorry you had a bad day too. I did something like that once... when I put my dog down. I ate until I hurt and threw up a bit, and then did it again. Pretty awful.

    Babyfood lacks nutrition though since much of it is cooked. The only binge killer I know of is the Raw Food diet. I never binged, even when pregnant on this diet. For more info, check out http://optimus-ana.blogspot.com/

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  6. I hate it when this happens. :[ I hope you're feeling much better soon.

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  7. I'm sorry you binged :( Good luck on your new diet though! I bet that some of the weight you gained is just water weight.

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  8. There have been many times when I wish I could do something to make food taste like nothing. It would make things so much easier.

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  9. Gosh I know, I wish all food was like finger nail polish remover. Yuck.

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